Some cool animal movie images:
Stray Cat Rock: Machine Animal
Image by 50 Watts
From the liners notes to the Japanese movie "Stray Cat Rock: Machine Animal"
blogged here: 50watts.tumblr.com/post/6870099832/from-the-liners-notes-...
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Here's a movie short I want to make. Marge as me. Bernardo as Bob Peterson. Orin as Coen Brothers protagonist. And Kevin McC as the Beaver.
Image by V'ron
Marge, the look of horror on your face closely mirrors the look of horror I had on my face during (in hindsight, my favorite) Kevin story, so this looks like a place to tell it.
[establishing shot]
It's a crappy, snowy evening in Milwaukee, and myself, Bob Peterson, Al Gordon and others have just settled in to watch the Bears in the Super Bowl. As I am the only one in the bunch with any Chicago ties, I'm the only one who even remotely gives a crap about it.
[phone rings]
Kevin and Steven call me, apparently from some truck stop in Kenosha. The car's broken down and they need somebody to rescue them. Oh, so you called me? Um, I don't have a car.
"But you have all these friends who do... please come get us!"
And what exactly is wrong with your car?
"Um, it's not our car. Uhhhhh.... it's the crew car."
I put the phone down and took a deep breath. Jesus Mary and Joseph. You dickslaps went joyriding to Chicago in the company car. And now you're stuck in Kenosha. What, you're going to tell Ben and Larry that you were only coming to visit me? YOU MOST CERTAINLY WILL NOT! DON'T YOU DARE DRAG ME INTO THIS! What, like that would have been OK if you took the crew car to go joyriding to visit me? And even if it was, nobody's going to buy the "We missed your exit in Milwaukee and suddenly found ourselves in Kenosha" excuse. (Wait a second. From you, Kevin, they might.)
Oh hell, why am I even going to help you? I don't know. Because you're desperate and someday I'm going to be desperate and I'll need somebody to call, even if that somebody has absolutely NO MEANS WHATSOEVER to help. Except that I've always been "resourceful." And one can never make enough good deposits in the Good Karma bank.
In this case, "resourceful" meant finding one of Al's, um, business associates, and climbing in the back of this guy's gasoline-smelly VW Microbus that desperately needed a tune up, and dragging Bob Peterson with me ("I am not getting in that stalker van alone, you're coming with me" as if Bob could actually spoil for a fight. "What, you think I'm going to be able to stop somebody from killing you, V'ron?" "No, you're going to stop me from killing Kevin!") and going to this truck stop in Kenosha in the middle of winter with no heater. (Probably a good thing. The heater would have ignited the gas fumes).
So we get there where's there's -- I shit you not -- country music on the jukebox and the place is packed with hardcore truckers with ZZTop beards, like the Large Marge scene in Pee-Wee's Big Adventure. But now, we're changing movie channels to TCM, for Kevin and Steven see us come in, stand up, and declare in their best loud Bette Davis voices " FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELTS, ITS GOING TO BE A BUMPY NIGHT!"
[sound effect: TV remote quickly changing channels to Comedy Central]:
You know that scene in Animal House where they go on a road trip and end up being the only white people in the bar? Well, it was a lot like that, right down to the point where Bob leans over and says to me in the same Eric Stratton voice, "We. Are going. To die."
[fade to black]
[establishing shot: Larry's office, the next day]
[camera backs out to show me trying to keep a straight face while Bob Peterson is in the hall, out of Larry's eyesight, doing everything he can to make me lose it. I'm barely containing my rage.]
"So, you want to tell me what happened last night?"
"Well," I started, "The Bears won the Super Bowl. How about that William 'The Refridgerator' Perry? He's something, eh?"
"About Kevin and his friend."
"Oh, well, yes they called me from Kenosha, and the next thing I knew, they were needing a place in Milwaukee to crash so I let them use my couch." Well, that was the truth. I just left out the part about the ZZTop Truckers.
[voice over] What I really wanted to say was, "Look, you have a pair of keys in Kevin's hand and a broken down car in Kenosha. You have everything you need to fire him, much less press charges. Do you really need me to narc my friend out? Please don't put me in this position. You're not paying me enough."
[fade to black. fade up, establishing shot, Green Bay, WI.]
I'm at Ben's place in Green Bay the following weekend for some kind of GOTV. Ben wasn't happy. He pours me a drink and he's crestfallen. Ben had to fire Kevin. I'm telling Ben, "Nobody's blaming you. Kevin fucked up. You had to do this. You had to can him. Anybody would have to."
Ben looks at me and says, "Veronica, have you ever had to take a puppy to the humane society to get put down?"
Roll credits.
